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the kid's developing independence and unique personality.
These are just the cliches of parenting that people indulge in, but they bug me.
We're very lucky, our son was a delight as a little kid, very even tempered and easily amused. But he demanded someone's attention all the time, and it was exhausting. I just feel like it's better to stay aware of the whole picture, because the whole truth is ultimately beautiful, and also, it's the truth.
4/?
I feel like "it goes by fast" is often the sentiment of parents of older kids, who now have opinions, now are pushing back, who maybe don't want anything to do with the parents anymore. I know I'm being unfair and generalizing but I feel like there's a dishonesty, a self-centeredness, in looking back on the infant/toddler stage, and reminiscing about the adorableness while forgetting the sleep deprivation. Goes hand in hand with bemoaning the older kid's belligerence, and ignoring
3/?
Treasuring the uniqueness of the time you're in is always good advice, whether applied to parenting or any other aspect of life. But, you know, for a sleep-deprived, stressed out new parent of a young child, "it goes by fast" is not helpful. Or I didn't find it to be.
What I would say to those parents is, it feels like it will last forever, but it won't. It doesn't necessarily get easier or harder, but it gets different. In the first 3 months, it gets different every 2-3 weeks.
2/?
Gonna rant on some about the way we talk about parenting.
For context, I have one child, he's 11.
When our son was a baby, and even a toddler and a preschooler, the thing we heard all the time was "treasure this time, it goes by fast."
Not true.
I mean, in the grand scheme of parenting, those stages are relatively short. And yes, when you look back later, it seems like an eyeblink. But when you're IN those stages, they go by very slow. They feel like they will last forever.
1/?