@lowqualityfacts For a really funny take on a "Secretary of War", check out a scene from Duck Soup, just after they made Chico Marx the Secretary of War:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFk0BnxndMA
Where are the Marx Brothers now that we really need them! (BTW, the video includes Harpo answering a telephone call and holding a conversation you can sort of follow even though Harpo is just honking a horn).