you *must* read the Battle of the Dildo at the Minneapolis Graduate Hotel (where ICE is lodging):

[darwinwoodka@mastodon.social]

@susankayequinn

I do think libertarians throwing them at women's basketball players is stupid though.

[kleinemy@toot.community]

@susankayequinn
This is a spectacular use of dildos and a very funny story in these dark times.

[realtegan@wandering.shop]

@susankayequinn

Nobody flinched. Nobody laughed nervously. Nobody asked, “Are you okay?”

They just nodded like hardened revolutionaries and said, “Okay, how many?”

[susankayequinn@wandering.shop]

@darwinwoodka they never have any original ideas, do they?

[susan_calvin@mastodon.social]

@susankayequinn " The air vibrated with that very specific end-of-empire energy where your brain says this is insane but your soul says don’t stop, this is sacred."

And that's before the dildos come in to play

[sablebadger@dice.camp]

@susankayequinn ICE should appreciate what the people are doing. They are running around with such little dick energy, and these people are trying to help.

We see your little dick problem sir, here is a big dick for you! Enjoy!

LOL

They really do have such fragile egos.

but they chose this path, they joined ICE, they followed the orders (willfully and enthusiastically) and then they escalated to murder so fuck them.

[starlily@mastodon.social]

@susankayequinn I would like to read this, but Substack is a fucking Nazi bar. So I wont.

[missconstrue@mefi.social]

@susankayequinn

I stood there, half-blind, lungs on fire, thinking:

We just got tear-gassed over a dildo.

Not a brick. Not a Molotov. Not a weapon.

A rubber dick.

That is how fragile federal masculinity is in 2026.

Hunter S. is smiling down from whatever opium laced reality he finds himself in. This is some top tier gonzo reporting.

[angusm@mastodon.social]

@susankayequinn @cstross I misspoke earlier when I said that “George Soros Bought Me a Handwarmer” was the name of my new band.

After careful consideration, the name of my new band is now "Clearance-Bin Dildos”.

[herrlorenz@chaos.social]

@susankayequinn
Dildos, not deaths! 🥰

☝️✌️🪈🍆✊

[susankayequinn@wandering.shop]

@angusm @cstross 🤣

[vaurora@mstdn.social]

@susankayequinn @brunogirin I'm sad to say that this reads like classic ChatGPT in sentence structure

[susankayequinn@wandering.shop]

@vaurora I think you have no idea what chatGPT sounds like... this is definitely not that
@brunogirin

[passenger@kolektiva.social]

@angusm @susankayequinn

Clearance-Bin Dildos is the first album by George Soros Bought Me A Handwarmer, surely?

[quadrivial@beige.party]

@susankayequinn give them their goddamned Pulitzer right now. Right. The. Hell. Now.

[gramrgednangel@beige.party]

@susankayequinn

Paraphrasing the dependent clauses that caught me:

When your brain says "Stop, this is insane," but your soul says, "No, don't stop, this is sacred"

[countablenewt@mastodon.social]

@susankayequinn
Boss makes a dollar
I make a dime
That's why I read about tactical dicks
On company time

[susankayequinn@wandering.shop]

@countablenewt 🤣

[vlrny@disabled.social]

@susankayequinn this is glorious!

"The air vibrated with that very specific end-of-empire energy where your brain says this is insane but your soul says don’t stop, this is sacred."

😘👌

[emma@orbital.horse]

@susankayequinn the sad part of that is that was the MN National Guard in the yellow vests, which Waltz said was there to protect protesters, and they didn't stop to process what happened, they fired on people. Shame on them, and shame on Waltz.