I think one of the biggest changes in how I communicate online came after moving to Fedi.

[bigmarinara@jorts.horse]

@artemis i think once i dropped off of twitter and went to bsky i started changing my mentality about that kind of platform. though on bsky it increasingly turned into the same kind of pointless verbal combat. i've had nothing like that here, which has been great. i don't post as much, but it's still a more pleasant experience.

[benaveling@mastodon.world]

It’s also the difference between conscious boosting (someone must think a thing is worth boosting) and algorithmic boosting (all engagement is considered good)
@artemis @dalias

[artemis@dice.camp]

@sinvega
Yeah, I think people develop a fighting mentality & eventually make very little distinction between friend & foe. Everything feels like it could be an attack.

[sinvega@mas.to]

@artemis and if it's not, it's an opportunity to :|

[artemis@dice.camp]

@thecrushedviolet
Exactly. Even if you really want to have productive conversations & aren't looking for debate, it's an environment that ends up feeling so hostile, so it becomes hard to approach people in good faith.

[artemis@dice.camp]

@dalias
Yeah, the moderation experience on a good Fedi instance is wildly different from being on major social media.

[artemis@dice.camp]

We should never stop trying to make Fedi better & safer. It's not perfect. As usual, marginalized people have the worst experience.

So this is not to say "yay! We did it! It's perfect & never needs to change."

But the spaces that we build for ourselves can be so much better than what private enterprise has to offer. We can have fucking *conversations* here.

[bytebro@mastodonapp.uk]

@artemis

Fedi is 'a process' rather than just 'a place'. It is always changing, and as long as it continues to change for the better, I'm in.

[afewbugs@social.coop]

@artemis I've seen more people genuinely apologise for a misunderstanding on here and then make up and move on than I have in all my time on algorithmic social media put together, where the incentive is to instead dunk on each other in an ever escalating argument for the clicks of spectators

[artemis@dice.camp]

And frankly, it's been slow, but I have seen a lot of people—including instance admins—responding to the suggestions & critiques of marginalized people.

It's not everyone & it's not enough, but it does fucking happen here. The hard conversations happen & at least *some* people try to make this better.

One thing I love about Fedi is that it *can become better.*

[benaveling@mastodon.world]

And to add to that, not just ‘someone’, but someone you have chosen to trust with your follow. @artemis @dalias

[futuristicrobert@infosec.exchange]

@bytebro @artemis wow. I never thought of it like that. That's a really good way to view Fedi. It's almost like how the internet is not a place but a series of protocols.

We can improve it.

[artemis@dice.camp]

Also, if you are having a lot of interactions with people acting in bad faith or harassing you, it is worth considering moving to an instance with stricter moderation or that blocks or restricts more problem instances.

Dicecamp has been great for me, but there are plenty of great ones out there.

[futuristicrobert@infosec.exchange]

@afewbugs @artemis

Heck, the fact that people even talk on here instead of yelling over each other... Like me here replying to you and agreeing with you how much the algo's just make things worse for everyone.

[artemis@dice.camp]

I especially recommend this if you're on mastodon social. I'm really glad you signed up & joined Fedi, but you may be able to find an even better corner to call your own (but do what you want—the point is it's your choice).

"Just move instances" is not a solution to systemic problems, but if you think you could personally have a better experience, it's a thing you can try.

[kali@discuss.systems]

@artemis i agree, mastodon.social is too big, they attract too many trolls.

[epilonious@toot.lgbt]

@artemis not my anxious ass going "Is today the day I finally send a small note to a popular person on a popular-but-problematic instance that their instance is problematic and they should consider moving off it because it'll likely only get worse and has already responded badly to criticism... Or am I just seeking the dopamine from a chaotic low-stakes online interaction. Again."

[epilonious@toot.lgbt]

@artemis (no it's not you/re instance)

[artemis@dice.camp]

@afewbugs

Exactly. And the thing is, when you see other people responding in that way—asking for clarification instead of assuming the worst & apologizing when called out—it feels safer to do that yourself. I've become a lot better at just not responding with the first emotional thing that pops into my head & actually thinking "what would it look like to just talk to this person in a mutually respectful way?"

[c0dec0dec0de@hachyderm.io]

@afewbugs @artemis I semi-frequently give random internet strangers here a “like” when I see them apologize or course-correct, just to let them know that a random internet stranger approves of their ability to apologize or recognize that there’s a misunderstanding and maybe they’re at fault or can do better.