SF STORY PREMISE:
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@dearlove Ideally the spell does it deniably, eg. by giving them an aneurysm or an unfortunate fall from a Moscow apartment window or something not obviously magically-induced. At one per day, in one week we could get rid of Elon Musk, Larry Ellison, Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates, and quite probably Vladimir Putin and a couple of other deplorables. I'd call that a job well done!
The snag is, what if the spell has no termination clause and keeps going. After a few years we run out of billionaires …
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@dearlove Ideally the spell does it deniably, eg. by giving them an aneurysm or an unfortunate fall from a Moscow apartment window or something not obviously magically-induced. At one per day, in one week we could get rid of Elon Musk, Larry Ellison, Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates, and quite probably Vladimir Putin and a couple of other deplorables. I'd call that a job well done!
The snag is, what if the spell has no termination clause and keeps going. After a few years we run out of billionaires …
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@cstross Don't go there, murder is already so normalised and so attractive for its catharsis.
We absolutely must push for expropriation of excess wealth, and a just reckoning for hoarders who undermined society. But what happened to a progressive movement that was optimistic about humanity and against capital punishment?
@seachaint @cstross The rich control the law, you can't defeat them within their own domain.
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SF STORY PREMISE:
SETI program decodes an alien signal clearly targeting us.
Hi! We see you're still facing the Great Filter! We want to help! Based on your anatomy per broadcasts we decoded, here is a blueprint for a device that will solve your problem!
Humans: decode blueprint.
It's for an improved guillotine.
@cstross the biggest help is telling us what the great filter is
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SF STORY PREMISE:
SETI program decodes an alien signal clearly targeting us.
Hi! We see you're still facing the Great Filter! We want to help! Based on your anatomy per broadcasts we decoded, here is a blueprint for a device that will solve your problem!
Humans: decode blueprint.
It's for an improved guillotine.
@cstross Until the last line I was sure they’d decoded advertising spam
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@cstross Until the last line I was sure they’d decoded advertising spam
I read an SF story years ago where the decoded signal was an alien phishing scam.
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"Takes us to your leader" does hit differently when the aliens show up with a guillotine.
<grinch's evil grin dot gif>
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@cstross Don't go there, murder is already so normalised and so attractive for its catharsis.
We absolutely must push for expropriation of excess wealth, and a just reckoning for hoarders who undermined society. But what happened to a progressive movement that was optimistic about humanity and against capital punishment?
I wish the Epstein Class long lives.
In prison.
And not one of those cushy, country club, white collar prisons.
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@cstross That's a good "microfic" as is already.
Makes me ponder wistfully ... the human written prompt for AI slop is, likely, far more interesting to read than the LLM generated AI slop output. I could see it as a legitimate microfic format.
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SF STORY PREMISE:
SETI program decodes an alien signal clearly targeting us.
Hi! We see you're still facing the Great Filter! We want to help! Based on your anatomy per broadcasts we decoded, here is a blueprint for a device that will solve your problem!
Humans: decode blueprint.
It's for an improved guillotine.
This is a good short story and I am kinda tempted to do it as like a 4p comic.
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@cstross Until the last line I was sure they’d decoded advertising spam
@RevPancakes @cstross
Invading aliens hate this one weird trick. -
SF STORY PREMISE:
SETI program decodes an alien signal clearly targeting us.
Hi! We see you're still facing the Great Filter! We want to help! Based on your anatomy per broadcasts we decoded, here is a blueprint for a device that will solve your problem!
Humans: decode blueprint.
It's for an improved guillotine.
@cstross Contact 2: Billionaire Boogaloo
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@cstross 😁
Ok, but, how do you improve a guillotine? You make it laser? But then you need electricity. You make it serial/self reloading victims? But then you'll miss the show. You make it self cleaning blood residue? It makes it less scary!
It's such a perfect, simple, efficient, terrorizing machine...
@lgsp @cstross A guillotine relies upon sliding motion, whereas a rotating blade can provide much more efficient cutting.
Notice how we slice cold cuts with a circular spinning blade, not a sliding blade.
An improved guillotine could use a circular blade attached to an axle. The axle rolls down a ramp. This ramp has a slot for the blade, and this slot is aligned with the victim's neck.
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@cstross Until the last line I was sure they’d decoded advertising spam
@RevPancakes @cstross What is Ovaltine, why is it mine, and why be I sure to drink it?
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@dearlove Ideally the spell does it deniably, eg. by giving them an aneurysm or an unfortunate fall from a Moscow apartment window or something not obviously magically-induced. At one per day, in one week we could get rid of Elon Musk, Larry Ellison, Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates, and quite probably Vladimir Putin and a couple of other deplorables. I'd call that a job well done!
The snag is, what if the spell has no termination clause and keeps going. After a few years we run out of billionaires …
-
SF STORY PREMISE:
SETI program decodes an alien signal clearly targeting us.
Hi! We see you're still facing the Great Filter! We want to help! Based on your anatomy per broadcasts we decoded, here is a blueprint for a device that will solve your problem!
Humans: decode blueprint.
It's for an improved guillotine.
@cstross I appreciate that the aliens have read our internet and decided to simultaneously threaten and troll the ruling class.
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@cstross the biggest help is telling us what the great filter is
@fishidwardrobe @cstross The Epstein class.
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@cstross Don't go there, murder is already so normalised and so attractive for its catharsis.
We absolutely must push for expropriation of excess wealth, and a just reckoning for hoarders who undermined society. But what happened to a progressive movement that was optimistic about humanity and against capital punishment?
@seachaint @cstross Nah. We aren't voting our way out of this.
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This is a good short story and I am kinda tempted to do it as like a 4p comic.
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