Alone Season 4 watch thread.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

This season is uncomfortable. You've got people who really want to be there and people who really don't, and the latter came to make the former happy and then they found out what it actually meant and changed their mind real quick. Poor Logan. His dad is so angry and disappointed and the only thing keeping him from unloading on his son is the cameras.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

You have to make a phone call to leave, so I would 100% win, because I am not making a phone call under any circumstances.

[bryan@dusty.ninja]

@swelljoe
Your BMI can fall below X% during a health check (don’t know how dynamic that is for gender/height/weight/age). Or forget radio, get injured, and die. Plenty of ways to still lose!

[swelljoe@mas.to]

@bryan I am in peak physical condition for Alone: Chubby but fit. Come winter, I'm 25 pounds ahead of the competition.

And, I'm not gonna build a boat.

Honestly, it wouldn't be fair to the other contestants to put me on Alone. (OK, I would probably die.)

[bryan@dusty.ninja]

@swelljoe
I would love to know someone who went on the show… so I highly encourage you to do it. Mastodon is probably the loosest relationship tier but I’ll take it. 😆

Even if you tap out I’m with you if you stay honest. Don’t say some BS like not caring about winning or have nothing to prove. Just state you let everyone down, ultimately wasted a slot in the competition, and deserve the loss. Be honest 😂

Maybe being honest about the bitter loss will get you invited back for a retry season…

[swelljoe@mas.to]

@bryan I don't know what I'd do with my dogs and cat. It'd cost a fortune to board them in a nice place for three months (it's a lot of dogs). I think I'd actually do OK, though. Not bothered by being alone in the woods for a long time...I've done it many times, I like the quiet and solitude. I'd want a book or two, which apparently you can't have, but I'd get by.

But, also, it still looks like a miserable experience, and it's getting more miserable every season with stronger contestants.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

OK, genuinely what the fuck is up with nobody building a signal fire? Are they not allowed? Everyone is still wandering around five(?) days in? I thought 3/7 pairs still being lost after the first day would be a funny failure. But, all of them being lost for days and two pairs already going home?

They're not sending their best this season.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

One dude cooked a slug, though, so it can't be against the rules. So, why aren't they all keeping a smoky fire going all day?

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Lordy, we're about to lose another pair to an injury in the woods. Poor judgment all around this season. I knew it was going to be a short season, but this is ridiculous. I don't think any of the pairs have even met up yet?

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Brooke is doing a monologue to the creatures of the woods. I cant believe she's going to be one of the winners (but I think she is, because everybody else is such a mess).

[bryan@dusty.ninja]

@swelljoe
It’s quite the dynamic when two starving people are together trying to make decisions about base camp, shelter, cooking, activities, and projects.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

@bryan they'll have to find each other first! I don't think any of them has even made contact, and I'm on the third episode!

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Oh, good, there's a father/son pair that actually likes and respects each other. Maybe we'll have a real contest and Brooke and whatever her husband is named won't win by default, after all.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Day 8 and one pair has finally met up. This season is chaos.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Brooke, are you seriously afraid of an orb weaver?

They got a lot of nerve showing this caption after showing an obviously harmless and non-aggressive spider.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Boat!

"I don't know if what I'm doing is the right thing to be doing at this moment in time."

I know.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

He hasn't found food. So he's gonna build a boat. The sensible thing.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

Meanwhile, Brooke has found a tangled up net with a bunch of floats. And, despite her best efforts to not make a signal fire in eight+ days, her husband has found her.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

It's gonna be Brooke and Dave, I think? They're not particularly good at anything, but they're not doing stupid shit over and over.

[swelljoe@mas.to]

I will be stunned if Brooke and Dave don't win this one. They understand the assignment, and they seem to be the only people who do. No fucking around with boats and projects. They're fishing. They're chopping fire wood. They're not injuring themselves through foolishness.

They are cooking and eating in their camp, which, in ordinary circumstances would be bad news (they even know it and said so), but they're up against far larger incompetence.