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The year is 1992

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  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    uep@timeloop.cafeundefined

    @monkeyninja for us heathens, "Constant gravy" also could work

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    rinkside@mastodon.onlineundefined

    @monkeyninja This is one of the best misheard lyrics I’ve ever come across! 😂

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    tankgrrl@hachyderm.ioundefined

    @monkeyninja Imagining it morphing over time and your mom making gravy and singing "Constant Gravy?"

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    imalcolm@mastodon.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja

    Great, now I'm constantly craving gravy...

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    pomcountyirregs@mstdn.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja I’ve had worse ideas for a song than “God bless gravy.”

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    cowboywho@libranigans.comundefined

    @monkeyninja There is an actual gravy song ... https://youtu.be/MsRY9vqr9rA

    teeceegee@toot.communityundefined 1 Reply
    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    rowlandm@disabled.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja Song from Paul Kelly - How to Make Gravy

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYqIF2XkqKU

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    jwharrison@universeodon.comundefined

    @monkeyninja For other occasions, there's the Rolling Stones' "Anybody Seen My Gravy"

    0
  • cowboywho@libranigans.comundefined cowboywho@libranigans.com

    @monkeyninja There is an actual gravy song ... https://youtu.be/MsRY9vqr9rA

    teeceegee@toot.communityundefined

    @CowboyWho @monkeyninja In Australia, we have a whole Gravy Day (21st December) thanks to this song 😄
    https://youtu.be/noDE38viJN0?si=5uhiFx8mnYDiK-9w

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    andrewhenry@mastodon.energyundefined

    The Tragically Hip

    🎵

    “Porridge, it couldn’t come at a worse time.”

    https://youtu.be/FhpezwGtDEg?t=104&si=YGM-4igdngg2kTFM

    @monkeyninja

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    archivescribe@mastodon.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja I hope someday K.D. Lang hears this story. Your mom is a hoot!

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    sgsax@mastodon.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja This is the most wholesome story I've heard all day.

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    llanero24@social.mollejuo.comundefined

    @monkeyninja In Spanish there's a whole sub-genre on how English songs "sounds" to a native -Spanish- speaker. For example, "We're not going to take it", if you say "huevos con aceite" sounds equal 🙃 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNoxyL0C4jI

    nuclearoatmeal@beige.partyundefined 1 Reply
    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja

    Every Thanksgiving I make stuffing waffles, and I GodBlessGravy.

    littlebobbytables@mstdn.socialundefined 1 Reply
    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    jessetmccann@mas.toundefined

    @monkeyninja fifteen minutes in waldenbooks 1992 please.

    liquor_american@universeodon.comundefined 1 Reply
    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    isol@mastodon.auundefined

    @monkeyninja

    What's the next line - "hallway beans"?
    Do they go with the gravy?

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    wesdym@mastodon.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja At the time that Grisham was really hot, so were some cheeky, oblique self-help books. (Much less direct than later pop-sci; they were 'fun'.) I had a vivid dream that Grisham put one out, and I wandered into a Waldenbooks where it had its own display. The publisher hired people who looked like lawyers to stand around it. The book was titled, "Take Time to Smell the Pepper Grinders". I wish to FSM I was making that up. It's not even clever. It doesn't even make any sense.

    0
  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    beckermatic@pleroma.arielbecker.comundefined
    @monkeyninja best mondegreen ever.
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  • monkeyninja@10base2.devundefined monkeyninja@10base2.dev

    The year is 1992.
    I’m employed by Waldenbooks in the mall.
    I’m stocking the shelves with the copies of “The Pelican Brief” that have recently arrived.
    Dave with the beard (not to be confused with Dave without a beard who was also working that evening) yells across the store that my mother is on the phone.
    I’m 16 and this is still embarrassing to me.
    “Hello?”
    “Honey, it’s me.”
    “ Hi mom, what’s up?”
    “I need you to translate something for me.”
    “Right now?”
    “It can’t wait! I’ll forget again!”
    “Okay sure mom, what is it?”
    “There’s a song that keeps coming on the radio and I need to know what they’re saying, here quickly before it finishes!”

    The phone is put near the radio

    “Could you hear it honey?”
    “…Yes?”
    “Oh thank God! Are they really singing, ‘God Bless Gravy’ or am I losing it?”
    “…I’m sorry, what now?”
    “Gravy. God Bless Gravy. Is that what they’re saying?”

    I pinch the bridge of my nose as only an exasperated teenager is capable of doing before I answer.

    “The song is ‘Constant Craving’ mom…by K.D. Lang…did you really think they were saying ’God Bless Gravy’?”
    “Well that’s what I heard! Thanks honey, see you tonight!”

    I keep hoping that I will some day meet K.D. Lang so I can convey the story. My mother continues to be a fan and when she still cooked, sang that song any time she was making gravy.

    catmisgivings@stranger.socialundefined

    @monkeyninja is anyone here in these replies NOT singing "God Bless Gravy" right now?

    0
  • jessetmccann@mas.toundefined jessetmccann@mas.to

    @monkeyninja fifteen minutes in waldenbooks 1992 please.

    liquor_american@universeodon.comundefined

    @jessetmccann @monkeyninja klutz yo-yo ftw

    0
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