What the actual fuck.
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets other countries will have to shoot them fown to get into space
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets This is completely impossible to make work. Sounds more like a stock pump scam.
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@oblomov @mycotropic @sundogplanets this is clearly just advertising BS. In addition to being a generally bad idea, 500-1000 km is well into the Van Allen belts, so the radiation makes this even more stupid
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"Launching a constellation of a million satellites that operate as orbital data centers is a first step toward becoming a Kardashev II-level situation"
THIS IS IN AN FCC FILING NOT A SCIENCE FICTION NOVEL WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I'M DEAD
@sundogplanets What’s a Kardeshian II-level situation?
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets "Pump and dump" is the natural state of being for homo-muskiens.
He recently said that Tesla will soon be building a million humanoid robots a year.
It's the same game every time.
https://www.theregister.com/2026/01/29/truth_telling_man_always_tells_truth/
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets @robpike lol data centers in space what a publicity stunt. Makes absolutely zero material sense.
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets Isn't it obvious that speedrunning Kessler syndrome to no obvious benefit is how you become a multiplanetary species?
It's just science or something.
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"Launching a constellation of a million satellites that operate as orbital data centers is a first step toward becoming a Kardashev II-level situation"
THIS IS IN AN FCC FILING NOT A SCIENCE FICTION NOVEL WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I'M DEAD
@sundogplanets Is there enough rocket fuel on earth for a million rocket launches?
What about the logistics?
Say you manage to find 100 suitable rocket launch sites and have a successful launch a week from each site.
Assuming a 100% successful launch rate and that all of the satellites end up in the right orbit first time that's still 10,000 weeks before all of the satellites are in place.
So 192 years?
Are my calculations correct?
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@Chancerubbage @sundogplanets @Barbramon1 Most importantly, there are far too many of them already.
@SecondUniverse @sundogplanets @Barbramon1
Of course there is. I did math on the existing numbers months back (there are so many I expected them to be smaller) to determine ideally how much land area each existing then could cover for internet signal.
It’s stupefying even if any one trusted Musk as a carrier. I certainly don’t.
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets The only relevant sci-fi: "we don't know who struck first, but we know it was us who darkened the sky."
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets this is like the archetypal gold rush land grab. No thought or card for the consequences on others eg astronomy, debris impact etc. Just selfish short term monetary gain. The polluter should pay!
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@sundogplanets What’s a Kardeshian II-level situation?
@christianschwaegerl
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kardashev_scale
Don't ask me what this will do to our planet 😞. @sundogplanets -
What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
So, this has all the hallmarks of a 'Musk's name just came up in an Epstein email, begging for a wild party invite to the island’ distractor vibe to it.
You can make 1 million chocolate bars, just like that. I'm pretty sure that the sourcing for parts for satellites is less do-able.
Still. Eyes on.
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets The US gov't, owned by the broligarchs, won't approve and even fund one of their Epstien friend's projects? Seriously, that's a foolish question. Of Course they'll approve it, give him tax money for it, tell the world to fuck off, and continue with impunity.
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets I am so disappointed, man. When I was in highschool, I thought Elon Musk was so cool. The "real life Iron Man." Now, what the fuck.
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@sundogplanets Is there enough rocket fuel on earth for a million rocket launches?
What about the logistics?
Say you manage to find 100 suitable rocket launch sites and have a successful launch a week from each site.
Assuming a 100% successful launch rate and that all of the satellites end up in the right orbit first time that's still 10,000 weeks before all of the satellites are in place.
So 192 years?
Are my calculations correct?
@the_wub @sundogplanets spacex already deploys 20-60 satellites per launch - and this is the same delusional management who think they can turn around launches in a day or less, so the bottleneck would (in their eyes) be building the satellites themselves
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
This is why he was so invested in Trump winning.
Can't be having all that regulation, now can we?
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets IMHO it's another dumb way of Elon Musk to hype his techno bullshit. Orbital datacenter is a stupid idea on so many levels. Nobody will pit actual money into it. (Maybe the current US government, but nobody sane.)
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
@sundogplanets scientists need to build lasers to zap them out of earth. Put them into a trajectory to leave the earth.
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What the actual fuck. It's not April Fools Day, right? This is real?! Fuck you, SpaceX. Maybe this will help regulators realize how fucking shortsighted companies' plans in orbit are?
Surely the FCC won't rubber-stamp-approve this one??... ONE MILLION STARLINKS FUUUUCCCKKKKKK
https://au.pcmag.com/networking/115649/spacex-eyes-1-million-satellites-for-orbital-data-center-push
“What day/night will be the wildest party on your island?”