The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat.
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross hey, that's not fair on Northern Ireland... they like katamine, too
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross since Brexit it’s more like four gerbils in a toilet roll tube. Or that’s how it seems to me from Canada.
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross and where one of the fourth raccoon’s personalities *really* likes brown bears and is convinced that it is in fact one itself
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross
I am still extremely bitter that Scotland got dragged out of the EU despite us voting overwhelmingly to stay. -
The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross To be fair, that one was kidnapped and is suffering from PTSD, not dissociative identity disorder, while it tries to cope with its parents and its kidnappers playing nice.
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross the 4th raccoon seems to be coming to its senses slowly. Star Trek may not yet be far off on the year
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
It isn't cocaine.
It's the steroids used in the beef cattle that aren't completely absorbed by the animals, so there are still detectable trace amounts found in the meat and milk. :D
It was one of the big scandals in the early 1990's and it still has not been fixed yet... 🤦
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross we enjoy your description but, sadly, it's our obligation as a plural activist to point out that this is a harmful stereotype :/
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@cstross and where one of the fourth raccoon’s personalities *really* likes brown bears and is convinced that it is in fact one itself
"Actually we're the bear's leg, who would want to be a distinct animal!"
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross I thought we deported the racoons to their native country of Rwanda?
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"Actually we're the bear's leg, who would want to be a distinct animal!"
@davey_cakes @mark_f_lynch @cstross All of this is very unfair to the bears and the raccoon: who are much more civilised and decent.
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@cstross
I am still extremely bitter that Scotland got dragged out of the EU despite us voting overwhelmingly to stay. -
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@kirtai @cstross Fast forward. When IndyRef2 comes, I will gladly and publicly encourage Scots to vote Go. It’s about European union, a fight in which I very emphatically have a dog. The EU will fast-track Scottish accession; Spain, specifically and expressly, has stated it will throw up no barriers. Scotland won’t be the seceder. It will be abandoning a seceder to rejoin the Union it overwhelmingly supports. And Europe will welcome it back home.
3/n
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@kirtai @cstross Fast forward. When IndyRef2 comes, I will gladly and publicly encourage Scots to vote Go. It’s about European union, a fight in which I very emphatically have a dog. The EU will fast-track Scottish accession; Spain, specifically and expressly, has stated it will throw up no barriers. Scotland won’t be the seceder. It will be abandoning a seceder to rejoin the Union it overwhelmingly supports. And Europe will welcome it back home.
3/n
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross
Tattered remnants of the English Empire. -
The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
Surely it’s a weasel, stoat, ferret and a mink dressed in an ankle length puffer jacket.
The raccoon only sees a stuffed puffer jacket/rag doll to chuck about and play games with.
Three of the creatures in the puffer jacket have sussed that the raccoon is actually a skunk, but one is still obliviously chewing its own leg off.
Meanwhile the sleek otter on the other side of the Channel is growing impatient of this whole anthropomorphic tale…
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The UK isn't a country; it's four raccoons in a trench coat. Only one of them is a brown bear that outweighs the rest by 9:1 and keeps dragging them places they don't want to go (like: out of Europe), and the fourth raccoon has dissociative identity disorder and is self-medicating with cocaine because it's Northern Ireland.
@cstross
Concise summary.
DID racoon just wants to be with its closest neighbouring raccoons, the bear can just lumber off into the woods.
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https://www.eunews.it/2026/02/16/elisabetta-gualmini-lascia-il-pd-e-aderisce-ad-azione-pronto-il-passaggio-a-renew-europe/
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