It's the Fesshole/Vagina Museum crossover event you've all been waiting for.
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Remember: the pelvic floor is, on a day-to-day basis, carrying around at the very least the weight of your intestines (about 3.5 kilos). If you're pregnant, it supports the whole weight of that, too. These muscles are *strong*. Something smooth and slippery doesn't stand a chance.
It is also worth noting that a tool such as a speculum as it's inserted, a vaginal dilator or certain designs of sex toy are nearly the perfect shape to be shot out quite some distance when lubricated. They're basically shaped like vagina-compatible bullets.
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It is also worth noting that a tool such as a speculum as it's inserted, a vaginal dilator or certain designs of sex toy are nearly the perfect shape to be shot out quite some distance when lubricated. They're basically shaped like vagina-compatible bullets.
So, to conclude, yes, you probably could clonk your gynaecologist round the head with a speculum if they made you laugh at precisely the wrong moment. Which is why a lot of gynaecologists won't make a joke when the speculum and their head are in the danger zone.
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So, to conclude, yes, you probably could clonk your gynaecologist round the head with a speculum if they made you laugh at precisely the wrong moment. Which is why a lot of gynaecologists won't make a joke when the speculum and their head are in the danger zone.
@vagina_museum OK, I'm never going to remember the name for these*, but those carvings over doorways in the British Isles, of women doubling over and holding their vulva open?
I think I just figured out that it's a warning sign.
*Thanks to @caity for reminding me that the name is Sheela na gig.
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So, to conclude, yes, you probably could clonk your gynaecologist round the head with a speculum if they made you laugh at precisely the wrong moment. Which is why a lot of gynaecologists won't make a joke when the speculum and their head are in the danger zone.
Just about the only Didn't Happen element of the twat cannon post is that forcibly ejecting a speculum at someone's head would be very unlikely to knock them out, as a plastic speculum is too light to accelerate to sufficient force at close quarters for a knockout, even with a direct headshot.
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@vagina_museum OK, I'm never going to remember the name for these*, but those carvings over doorways in the British Isles, of women doubling over and holding their vulva open?
I think I just figured out that it's a warning sign.
*Thanks to @caity for reminding me that the name is Sheela na gig.
@KatS @vagina_museum 1. How have I not heard of these in nearly half a century in these isles,
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@KatS @vagina_museum 1. How have I not heard of these in nearly half a century in these isles,
@KatS @vagina_museum 2. when I read this toot I initially pictured that the doorway itself was styled as the vaginal entrance and was doubly surprised I'd never heard of this
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Just about the only Didn't Happen element of the twat cannon post is that forcibly ejecting a speculum at someone's head would be very unlikely to knock them out, as a plastic speculum is too light to accelerate to sufficient force at close quarters for a knockout, even with a direct headshot.
@vagina_museum we still use metal specul...(...a? ), metal ones here... (Germany)
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@KatS @vagina_museum 2. when I read this toot I initially pictured that the doorway itself was styled as the vaginal entrance and was doubly surprised I'd never heard of this
@i_cannot_today @KatS we are THRILLED to inform you that a lot of church doors are in fact very related to vulvas https://masto.ai/@vagina_museum/110168921500052009
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Just about the only Didn't Happen element of the twat cannon post is that forcibly ejecting a speculum at someone's head would be very unlikely to knock them out, as a plastic speculum is too light to accelerate to sufficient force at close quarters for a knockout, even with a direct headshot.
@vagina_museum i wonder whether the cops have a ballistics expert for that kind of things...🤔🤔🤔
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@vagina_museum we still use metal specul...(...a? ), metal ones here... (Germany)
@Limnobotanik Probably also too light, although if it hit at the screw mechanism it might cause a cut or bruise...
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Just about the only Didn't Happen element of the twat cannon post is that forcibly ejecting a speculum at someone's head would be very unlikely to knock them out, as a plastic speculum is too light to accelerate to sufficient force at close quarters for a knockout, even with a direct headshot.
@vagina_museum
you've convinced me speculum queefing should be an olympic sport -
undefined Oblomov shared this topic
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@vagina_museum
you've convinced me speculum queefing should be an olympic sport@floppyplopper @vagina_museum also vagina-compatible bullet is my new favorite expression. But the Olympic sport shouldn't be stuff about specula. Let engineering evolve to design the optimal vagina-compatible bullet!
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undefined filobus shared this topic
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@i_cannot_today @KatS we are THRILLED to inform you that a lot of church doors are in fact very related to vulvas https://masto.ai/@vagina_museum/110168921500052009
Gli ultimi otto messaggi ricevuti dalla Federazione
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@davidbures Hi David, do you know anything about it?
——8<——
error: Failed to clone repository https://github.com/sindresorhus/Defaults:
Cloning into bare repository '/Users/mora/Cork/Tuist/.build/repositories/Defaults-8c7120b1'...
fatal: unable to access 'https://github.com/sindresorhus/Defaults/': Failed to connect to github.com port 443 after 75104 ms: Couldn't connect to serverSorry this didn’t work
——8<——
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Ieri parlavamo di Apple e Microsoft a 4.000 miliardi di capitalizzazione. Oggi vedremo Nvidia a 5.000 miliardi, mentre Trump torna a fare il piazzista per Huang, nella speranza di incassare il famoso 15% dalle vendite di Nvidia in Cina. Un luna park di follia
https://www.ft.com/content/62933c70-261c-4b7a-a045-3f9f9cceccd7
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"Uno sportello bancomat ricoperto di feci. Questo è stato il brutto risveglio per i cittadini di Casalotti"
#bruttirisvegli #Shpalman
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l'esperto internazionale di armamenti #AndrewFeinstein ci ha detto:
"l’#F-15 è “uno dei caccia più usati nel bombardamento di Gaza, insieme con #F-16 e #F-35. È in grado di trasportare bombe da 2000 libbre, che sono state largamente usate”:
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oggi abbiamo qualcosa di speciale!
grazie a file esclusivi condivisi con noi da #TheDitch, noi di #FattoQuotidiano possiamo dimostrare che #Leonardo ha fornito componenti degli F-15 - aerei che hanno seminato distruzione a #Gaza - anche dopo il 7/10
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@rouh It really does look like the Stone Age. 😞
Israel bombed you back in time at least a couple of thousand years. Now you have to find something to burn instead of just turning on the oven. And even back then they had houses and didn't live in tents. 😞
It isn't fair.
After they are done with you, the billionaires will do the same to us outside of Palestine. The billionaires are at war with life on Earth. 🤬
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@simonperry Comprendo purtroppo...
