#agile #scrum #tech #softwaredevelopment #meme #funny
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@PavelASamsonov Wow. I haveread Charles Stross's "The Rhesus Chart", the 5th book of the Laundry Files, where a scrum of amoral investment bank quants turn into vampires. I figured scrum was generic British slang for an office team. Now after 30 seconds of googling for agile scrum I am truly chilled to the bone.
The Laundry books are like that, a nice Lovecraftian (or other) horror story spliced with Cold War bureaucracy and IT.
This moose got nowhere near "death march" programming and Agile, but did have to endure ISO9000/BS5750 and "Lean", plus "Race to the bottom" Outsourcing/Offshoring, "Everything at the cheapest possible price", and every problem/change management system being worse than the one before.
I'm retired now. I have no regrets.
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@PavelASamsonov Wow. I haveread Charles Stross's "The Rhesus Chart", the 5th book of the Laundry Files, where a scrum of amoral investment bank quants turn into vampires. I figured scrum was generic British slang for an office team. Now after 30 seconds of googling for agile scrum I am truly chilled to the bone.
@mwshook I always thought the collective noun for a group of bankers should be „a wunch“.
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@PavelASamsonov @cstross SCRUM were a nice common sense idea once. Then management and consultants got hold of it.
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@crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov There are some things that are useful in Scrum, but those things are usually what gets thrown out first.
Then there are things like ”velocity” that is some real bullshit.
And once you have ”leaders” imposing Scrum, it’s not self-organised anymore. So in practice it probably only works when the team is self-organised to begin with, which makes the whole framework have very limited value.
@ahltorp @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov It's all just "we suck at gathering requirements and writing specifications so we're going to dress that up as a virtue and give it a fancy name".
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@kwramm @ahltorp @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov for the record, "rock solid velocity" was the end-goal of James Shore's version of Agile (not Scrum), which I have always appreciated.
@travisfw @kwramm The ”immutable” Scrum Guide has been updated(!) many times since I was doing anything called Scrum more than 15 years ago, and conveniently that version of the document seems hard to find, but I believe you. But even the current Scrum Guide says that ”Other sources provide patterns, processes, and insights that complement the Scrum framework”.
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@travisfw @kwramm The ”immutable” Scrum Guide has been updated(!) many times since I was doing anything called Scrum more than 15 years ago, and conveniently that version of the document seems hard to find, but I believe you. But even the current Scrum Guide says that ”Other sources provide patterns, processes, and insights that complement the Scrum framework”.
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@ahltorp @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov It's all just "we suck at gathering requirements and writing specifications so we're going to dress that up as a virtue and give it a fancy name".
@woe2you It’s not only ”we suck at gathering requirements”, it’s also ”it’s often not meaningful to gather requirements in a vacuum”. Those are actually among the good parts, having stakeholder representation in the team. ”Fancy name” is among the bad parts.
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The Laundry books are like that, a nice Lovecraftian (or other) horror story spliced with Cold War bureaucracy and IT.
This moose got nowhere near "death march" programming and Agile, but did have to endure ISO9000/BS5750 and "Lean", plus "Race to the bottom" Outsourcing/Offshoring, "Everything at the cheapest possible price", and every problem/change management system being worse than the one before.
I'm retired now. I have no regrets.
@Cadbury_Moose @mwshook If you liked Laundry Files you might like The Rook, Antimemetics Division, and Monday Begins on Saturday.
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@Cadbury_Moose @mwshook If you liked Laundry Files you might like The Rook, Antimemetics Division, and Monday Begins on Saturday.
@PavelASamsonov @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook
+1 for antimemetics division -
@PavelASamsonov this happened to me about as literally as possible on this plane
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@PavelASamsonov @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook
+1 for antimemetics division@jaystephens @PavelASamsonov @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook
There is no antimemetics division -
@ahltorp @travisfw The oldest book I have in my library is Schwaber's "Software Development with Scrum" from 2002, which is quite interesting. It's a lot more people / culture focused than even the Scrum guide (there's just so much you can write on 11 pages). They do have burndowns there, but even their they put in bold that it's (delivered) "results" that matter. The burndown shows how much work remains so you can plan. That's it. Overall the book feels very close to the Agile Manifesto
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@ahltorp @travisfw well, yes, it's been part of the Scrum "story" just like certifications, trainers and whatnot. But it's not integral to Scrum.
You can do Scrum without "Velocity". You can use any other method to a) track how much work you do (better = track how much value is delivered and realized) and b) how much you can commit and reliably deliver at the end of the sprint (overcommitting = disappointed client).
You could track man-hours instead, and it works. -
@travisfw @kwramm The ”immutable” Scrum Guide has been updated(!) many times since I was doing anything called Scrum more than 15 years ago, and conveniently that version of the document seems hard to find, but I believe you. But even the current Scrum Guide says that ”Other sources provide patterns, processes, and insights that complement the Scrum framework”.
@ahltorp @travisfw I read the Scrum guide first in 2014 or so, after starting off with all kinds of books that add tons of extra complexity.
It's kinda liberating how simple Scrum can be. I feel the simpler you keep it, the more powerful it is.
And if in doubt between the Scrum guide and what helps your team: Talk to your team FIRST about what works for them - that's what Retrospectives are for - that's pretty much in line with Schwaber's book that I mentioned in my other reply. People first!
Gli ultimi otto messaggi ricevuti dalla Federazione
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@eremo qual era il tuo account?
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@stefano what fauna can see is not comparible to what humans can. However, hope your wish come true.
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@stefano Yikes! We have had from time to time rain water coming down into our office, from the roof, which sometimes turnes into a huge pool that spills over - but luckily no sewage.
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@ipd https://mastodon.gamedev.place/@aeva/111548050243676269 food for thoughts
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I just nearly had a heart attack.
A pigeon slammed into the closed window of my study, barely half a meter from me.
It's not even the first time it's happened.
It's got to be an idiot, considering the glass is so dirty there’s no way it couldn't see it...Dear 2026, can we please stop making me jump every single day?
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I think of time as based on brainwave oscillations as ticks.
Periodically interrupted by moments between breaths.
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@mms Oh no! Anyway...
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@aeva
It’s not. It was invented by the Swiss in order to sell watches.Fake analog, or round time was better. In the circle it gave this moment in the context of the sphere we stand on. And the other sphere we move around.
Digital time disconnects from that. Now is just a bunch of numbers now. Unconnected from past and future.
Writing this, I’m thinking of light color time.. the color of a clear sky at a given moment of a day based on color of solar light refracted at specific angles of the day.
